College Choices

College. College. College. University. College. Which University. Which major. College y u so expensive. College. College. College. Which uni is better for this major. Should I really take this major instead of the other?

Oh screw this. I hate choosing which major or which college I wanted to attend soon. It seems like I’ve still got a year and a half before the graduation high school itself, but then by the time I actually graduate I must already be accepted in the college I want to attend. Oh dang why is it like this.

I once said in my junior year (at year 8, to be exact) that I still have another year or two before I’ll have to seriously think about what major I would like to take in my sophomore year as well as which university I’m going to attend. It was so easy for me to say in those days that I’m going to enter The University of Indonesia, the best university nation-wide for their psychology. I was so certain that I’m to be a psychologist when I’m older, never to think about other majors or even to see it for even one second. As soon as I entered the second semester of sophomore, I realized that this “which university are you going to attend” thing becomes a threat to my soul which grew indesecive and a depressing matter to my mind. I now doubted my passion to cure people through the consolation I can give. I don’t feel like I’m even destined to have a deep connection with people and their past. I get too bored with myself so easily. I hate making people look ridiculous by travelling to their past. I don’t like deep dark talks with people. I don’t know, psychology pretty much makes a whole different sense to me now. I could always learn psychology from the books I buy in stores – not to be draining me mentally.

It was just last Wednesday when I said to my good friends Cindy and Mei that it must be hard to be like one of my classmate who is really good at everything (both academics and sports) because she will have a wider range of everything in college to choose from (except for doctor, engineer, and stuffs like that since we are the social students). But then it doesn’t make it any easier for me myself because the world of possibility still lies ahead of us.

After looking for a week or so, I have found 4 prospective majors I could choose from. They were tourism, psychology, broadcasting journalism, and public relations – which leads me to 2 of the most wanted majors my heart chose: psychology and broadcasting journalism. If only broadcasting journalism didn’t appear in the first place, my eyes will be fixed on psychology. Thank God – even though it burdens me again somehow. Oh by the way, the reasons why the other 2 didn’t match me was because they require me to master other languages soon as I enter university. For a person who doesn’t learn languages as easy as it is pronounced, language can pretty much be a torture for itself and also because I’m always moodiest when I’m tired. They will require more energy and will-power to make me actually finish my degree.

If I get to choose psychology, then my university choice will be clear: it will only be The University of Pelita Harapan (UPH), belonging to the same institute with my elementary school. But if I get to choose broadcasting journalism, then I will have to choose between UPH or Universitas Multimedia Nusantara (UMN) which is located further away from home rather than UPH.

The highest consideration I have if I have to pick UMN for my college is that they have more primitives than UPH. Which means I will have more moslem friends rather than the believers. Living in the comfort zone of my religion all these years have actually challenged me to go out there and learn to take risks in making friends with the world since my job will soon also require me to go to “crime scenes”. I realized that sooner or later I will be dealing with the cruel world of reality itself, though. But if most of my friends choose Christian based universities to prevent them from doing bad things whatsoever, why should I? Even though yes, I will not have the community to save me as fast as those who spent theirs in Christian universities

Even though UPH is a little bit more expensive than UMN, in the end I think I’d still prefer UPH because it is closer to home AND to the mall and Benton Junction. The mall and the Junction is always a good place to hang out and do homeworks. Especially when Starbucks is just an inch away from my hands. I could grab tons of them everyday. Besides, I am closer to home and I won’t need to deal with so much traffic everyday. But the best thing is, I guess, is that I won’t need a test to enter UPH. They don’t need it. We will just need to pay for the entrance form. How good it felt.

Well... Up to this moment I still couldn’t make up my mind on which uni to attend or which major to take. It will be up to time to make me choose in the end. Whatever I’ll choose soon, I pray that it will be the best thing I will ever have too choose. My life is too good to be lived more than once. -red